June 21, 2026

 June 21, 2026

I woke up feeling okay this morning, It's fathers day so I didn't really know how the day was going to go. I weighed myself and I lost .2 lbs, I was really glad it didn't go up. Then I spent time with my father, during that time he told me something he had heard about my cousin. Allegedly my cousin (33 year old man) met a 14 year old girl online and began chatting with her inappropriately, sexually. From the charges I'm assuming he sent her nudes too.

I'm really upset about this. I was groomed at her age by men his age, it really upsets me that she had to face that at all but especially from a family member of mine. Someone I hung around a lot as a child and considered my favorite cousin for years. I stopped liking him a few years ago when I realized he enabled my mother's drug use (sold to her for years on end). He also told me to get over her being a shitty mother, that bothered me. He compared our parents as if his father was in any way comparable to my mother.

Thinking of what he did reminded me of his father, his father was my favorite uncle for years too. I didn't realize until after he died that he was very inappropriate around me as a child. When I was maybe 8 years old he saw me playing with glue and compared it to come, he said something along the lines of he could imagine my face covered in it when I was older. 

Maybe a year later we were in the car together, alone, and he asked me to moan and call him daddy in a voicemail for my mother (his girlfriend or ex girlfriend at the time) to upset her. Multiple other times at those ages he jokingly said he was waiting for me to turn 18. Remembering all of this today was upsetting. He also joked about wanting to keep little girls hostage and not letting them shower (??) once. 

I liked that he was unhinged and weird, now I realize he shouldn't have been saying those things and most of them likely weren't meant to be jokes. The two just remind me of each other, they're both pedophiles. Or at least one, the other could just be a creep. It felt ironic. The cousin's mom (my aunt) also likes significantly younger men, the uncle mentioned was underage when they met, could it be genetic at this point? 

My aunt talks so badly about everyone and thinks she's a great person, I hope this situation brings her down to earth. Her son is a pedophile. How could you possibly talk badly of others after finding that out? I bet she'll send him money in jail/prison, if she isn't already. That's the type of person she is. And I don't mean that in a good way. I would let him suffer if I were her. I'd never speak to him again.

I hope he gets a long sentence, I wish it could be life. He has ruined so many people's lives, now including this young girl. I'm tired.

Good night.